Okay So sohini and i were coming down the stairs,school was over and we were in not too high a spirit, with just a few days left.This was last tuesday.Both of us were admiring stuff on the softboard outside the classes when Sohini stopped dead in her tracks and doubled over laughing.I asked her what was wrong and all she did was laugh like a loon and then i realized while shaking with laughter,she was also pointing at something.
Sohini:hehehehehehehehee
Me:ki holo?
Sohini:HEHEHEHEEEEEEEEHEEEEE HEEEEE
Me:Holo ta ki?
Sohini:Oi *choke-laugh* dekh
Me:ki?
Sohini:hehehehehehehe
sohini:soft*hic*board-e
Here is what i saw
WIERD FACTS(in red sketch pen,bold and underlined for everyones benefit lol)
fact 1.*i forgot*
fact 2:Fishes can change their gender
LOL did u know that?How very cost effective and convenient huh?DID u in ur wildest of wild F***ing dreams think of that?There were so many others but i forgot.
Sohini:Oh look, im a boy,now im a girl,im a boy, im a girl, oops! im a BIRL
...more laughter
Statutory warning:its strictly nonveg
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Okay so me and my bestfriend read this joke ages ago, and i still get a kick out of it.Dunno why im POSTing it tho, anyhoo have a laugh :P
The Smiths were unable to conceive children and decided to use a surrogate
father to start their family. On the day the surrogate father was to
arrive, Mr. Smith kissed his wife and said, "I'm off. The man should be
here soon" Half an hour later, just by chance a door-to-door baby
photographer rang the doorbell, hoping to make a sale.
"Good morning, madam. I've come to...."
"Oh, no need to explain. I've been expecting you," Mrs. Smith cut in.
"Really?" the photographer asked. "Well, good. I've made a speciality of
babies"
"That's what my husband and I had hoped. Please come in and have a seat"
After a moment, she asked, blushing, "Well, where do we start?"
"Leave everything to me. I usually try two in the bathtub, one on the
couch and perhaps a couple on the bed. Sometimes the living room floor is
fun too; you can really spread out!"
"Bathtub, living room floor? No wonder it didn't work for Harry and me"
"Well, madam, none of us can guarantee a good one every time. But, if we
try several different positions and I shoot from six or seven different
angles, I'm sure you'll be pleased with the results"
"My, that's a lot of....." gasped Mrs. Smith.
"Madam, in my line of work, a man must take his time. I'd love to be in
and out in five minutes, but you'd be disappointed with that, I'm sure"
"Don't I know it," Mrs. Smith said quietly.
The photographer opened his briefcase and pulled out a portfolio of his
baby pictures.
"This was done on the top of a bus in downtown London"
"Oh my God!" Mrs. Smith exclaimed, tugging at her handkerchief.
"And these twins turned out exceptionally well, when you consider their
mother was so difficult to work with"
"She was difficult?" asked Mrs. Smith.
"Yes, I'm afraid so. I finally had to take her to Hyde Park to get the job
done right. People were crowding around four and five deep, pushing to get
a good look"
"Four and five deep?" asked Mrs. Smith, eyes widened in amazement.
"Yes," the photographer said, "And for more than three hours too. The
mother was constantly squealing and yelling. I could hardly concentrate.
Then darkness approached and I began to rush my shots. Finally, when the
squirrels began nibbling on my equipment, I just packed it all in."
Mrs. Smith leaned forward. "You mean squirrels actually chewed on your,
um......equipment?"
"That's right. Well, madam, if you're ready, I'll set up my tripod so we
can get to work."
"Tripod?????"
"Oh yes, I have to use a tripod to rest my Canon on. It's much too big for
me to hold for very long. Madam? Madam? ....... Good Lord, she's
fainted!!"
Taken from jokes2go.com
The Smiths were unable to conceive children and decided to use a surrogate
father to start their family. On the day the surrogate father was to
arrive, Mr. Smith kissed his wife and said, "I'm off. The man should be
here soon" Half an hour later, just by chance a door-to-door baby
photographer rang the doorbell, hoping to make a sale.
"Good morning, madam. I've come to...."
"Oh, no need to explain. I've been expecting you," Mrs. Smith cut in.
"Really?" the photographer asked. "Well, good. I've made a speciality of
babies"
"That's what my husband and I had hoped. Please come in and have a seat"
After a moment, she asked, blushing, "Well, where do we start?"
"Leave everything to me. I usually try two in the bathtub, one on the
couch and perhaps a couple on the bed. Sometimes the living room floor is
fun too; you can really spread out!"
"Bathtub, living room floor? No wonder it didn't work for Harry and me"
"Well, madam, none of us can guarantee a good one every time. But, if we
try several different positions and I shoot from six or seven different
angles, I'm sure you'll be pleased with the results"
"My, that's a lot of....." gasped Mrs. Smith.
"Madam, in my line of work, a man must take his time. I'd love to be in
and out in five minutes, but you'd be disappointed with that, I'm sure"
"Don't I know it," Mrs. Smith said quietly.
The photographer opened his briefcase and pulled out a portfolio of his
baby pictures.
"This was done on the top of a bus in downtown London"
"Oh my God!" Mrs. Smith exclaimed, tugging at her handkerchief.
"And these twins turned out exceptionally well, when you consider their
mother was so difficult to work with"
"She was difficult?" asked Mrs. Smith.
"Yes, I'm afraid so. I finally had to take her to Hyde Park to get the job
done right. People were crowding around four and five deep, pushing to get
a good look"
"Four and five deep?" asked Mrs. Smith, eyes widened in amazement.
"Yes," the photographer said, "And for more than three hours too. The
mother was constantly squealing and yelling. I could hardly concentrate.
Then darkness approached and I began to rush my shots. Finally, when the
squirrels began nibbling on my equipment, I just packed it all in."
Mrs. Smith leaned forward. "You mean squirrels actually chewed on your,
um......equipment?"
"That's right. Well, madam, if you're ready, I'll set up my tripod so we
can get to work."
"Tripod?????"
"Oh yes, I have to use a tripod to rest my Canon on. It's much too big for
me to hold for very long. Madam? Madam? ....... Good Lord, she's
fainted!!"
Taken from jokes2go.com
My muse
|
"Baby wont you let me through,
Baby, won't you let me love you?
You said your heart was on the mend
Can't you see
It breaks me, to see you broken.."
It was then that it felt so right
Every brusque bruise
Vanishing from sight
"baby won't you let me heal it?
I promise you happiness
Can't you feel it?"
Every jagged edge,
i could feel them smoothen
Flatter yourself,Cos,i'd say
Being with you is more like
Owning a piece of Heaven.
I have laughed,I have cried,
But you shone through it all
Often, without having any light
To reflect on you
Nearby
You are crazy you are fun,You are my personal sun!
You are hard,You are soft
Inside out.
You are nuts
But,most of all,
You are a man of your words.
For He-Who-Must-Always-Be-Remembered ( by me
)
Baby, won't you let me love you?
You said your heart was on the mend
Can't you see
It breaks me, to see you broken.."
It was then that it felt so right
Every brusque bruise
Vanishing from sight
"baby won't you let me heal it?
I promise you happiness
Can't you feel it?"
Every jagged edge,
i could feel them smoothen
Flatter yourself,Cos,i'd say
Being with you is more like
Owning a piece of Heaven.
I have laughed,I have cried,
But you shone through it all
Often, without having any light
To reflect on you
Nearby
You are crazy you are fun,You are my personal sun!
You are hard,You are soft
Inside out.
You are nuts
But,most of all,
You are a man of your words.
For He-Who-Must-Always-Be-Remembered ( by me
)
Football,Maradona and yesterday
|
I wonder why the Americans call rugby "Football" when feet have nothing to do with it.And again, why call football soccer, and not just football, when feet have the most significant part to play?I had wanted to do a check up on the naming, but then i feel lazy, as usual :)Okay,so yesterday was a big day. Maradona flew to Kolkata, to inaugurate a football institution in a part of the city's not-unknown-any-more corner,Mahestala. That's pretty near my dad's college (he is the principal of the college,not a trustee or owner, but a be all of that place all the same for the time being, ah gah.)He is the big fan,he saw Maradona play in all of the world cups and the club games, while me, i have only seen videos that my dad has enthusiastically collected, and some replays of old games.Though, i have never been infused with the true spirit of his sportsmanship and skills, it was mesmerising all the same. That man is a wonder! You'd think that the ball is attatched to his left foot with an invisible something,even in moments where you'd probably think, Ah Sh*T,he's lost it( no pun),you would be sure to find himm rolling and cajoling the ball with his left foot.One of the best goals he'd scored was when he had threaded through the defence and scored,cutting off 6 english players.That has been named the goal of the century.Yes I'm an Argentine loyalist, through and through. I know Brazil is the big player.I know in a game Argentina vs.Brazil in a room full of hundred people, nobody would hear my voice cheering them on, but I'm all for them.In the Brazilian team,i feel, each player plays for himself, Ronaldinho would in all probability not pass the ball to anyone else if he issure he would score, when the team could have SURELY scored, if he had made a few small passes to mislead the opponents,and then hit.I don't claim to be an exeort,i've never been there, never EVER done that. But then, if u want to make it big, small things matter ( now this contradicts, i know,that inspite of taking into account all the small things, argentina hasn't made it big so many times, but still),Its my opinion, my reason, you may chose to disagree :).
Back to yesterday.I had been sitting in the field with my dad since 8:30 in the morning and Maradona arrived at around 11:30, security reasons i suppose.My dad had woken me up at 5:30 and i'd been watching footages of Maradona being brought from the airport to the hotel,in a bus with bullet proof behemoth windows so that vision could be inside out,he could see us, and so could we.I wasnt among the thousands who had thronged the streets at midnight with torches.This overwhelmed him,he said.Oh well he arrived,all smiling and waving,and you could see it in his face that he was,i use that word again,overwhelmed.It was a short ceremony,a short speech by Mahestala's Mla,followed by him inaugurating the Indian Football School,actually it was the foundation stone laying ceremony of the same, and then he spoke a few words.Most news channels and newspapers have given it to you, so i aint repeating (again,i lie, i feel lazy!:D).Okay um,he said that he was surprised to find a country so far away from his home playing and following the game with such interest and "Viva la India"..."Long live India". The Mahestala municipality gifted him a tajmahal of sterling silver and this kid had sketched a wonderful portrait of the revolutionary Che Guevara.Maradona was smitten :), he lifted his shirt sleeve and we could see his tattoo on his upper arm :D.
I got to click many pictures,though my dad took care of most of the stills. Our handycam went kaput, so i recorded videos on my dad's phone.And yea,I would remember this day for forever. Thanks dad! :)
Slide show of the pictures
Back to yesterday.I had been sitting in the field with my dad since 8:30 in the morning and Maradona arrived at around 11:30, security reasons i suppose.My dad had woken me up at 5:30 and i'd been watching footages of Maradona being brought from the airport to the hotel,in a bus with bullet proof behemoth windows so that vision could be inside out,he could see us, and so could we.I wasnt among the thousands who had thronged the streets at midnight with torches.This overwhelmed him,he said.Oh well he arrived,all smiling and waving,and you could see it in his face that he was,i use that word again,overwhelmed.It was a short ceremony,a short speech by Mahestala's Mla,followed by him inaugurating the Indian Football School,actually it was the foundation stone laying ceremony of the same, and then he spoke a few words.Most news channels and newspapers have given it to you, so i aint repeating (again,i lie, i feel lazy!:D).Okay um,he said that he was surprised to find a country so far away from his home playing and following the game with such interest and "Viva la India"..."Long live India". The Mahestala municipality gifted him a tajmahal of sterling silver and this kid had sketched a wonderful portrait of the revolutionary Che Guevara.Maradona was smitten :), he lifted his shirt sleeve and we could see his tattoo on his upper arm :D.
I got to click many pictures,though my dad took care of most of the stills. Our handycam went kaput, so i recorded videos on my dad's phone.And yea,I would remember this day for forever. Thanks dad! :)
Slide show of the pictures
Dostana
|
Okay so i thought i was over it above it all.Commercial movies.Gah.Who would watch them,seeing through it all...life is not either so merry or so horribly melodramatically sad either.So,i thought I had grown up, i like art films now.But guess what? I enjoyed this movie thoroughly,and i realize that i ought not typecast moviemakers, directors, actrs etc. I neither like Ab jr, nor priyanka chopra,but i thoroughly enjoyed this one!.Though gay jokes by now are passe,this was ribtickling, and thoroughly worth the 190 buck ticket and missing an evening worth of economics 3 4 months before ISC.So, yea. Watch it!It's hilarious!
Jago re
Okay so the coastal guards were sleeping, in broad daylight when a bunch of people landed on the harbour, brushed off the questions of the locals brusqely and climbed into cabs and went off to work.
Okay, so the taj was informed earlier that there might be a possibility of an attack.So the securities were posted out front, and the crazy trigger hungry people broke into the kitchen and made their way inside the hotel. What was the security for? petty theft?If you call your right to live petty, then yes.
Okay so,the Maharashtra Govenrment were informed about the RDX smuggling.
People somehow wield their powers for all the wrong reasons. With the city being attacked so many times, how people can afford to be nonchalant is something to think about...
People seem to forget the difference between being literate and being educated, so the normal reaction when a techie is found to be involved we go "WHOA, but he is educated!" Time we realise not to fear bearded men yelling jihad but take that guy next door seriously who knows a bit too much about tommy guns,is extra paranoid about his religion.White collar terrorism is the name of the game.
How civilized of us to get a kick out of setting a bomb off under sombody's butt.How very common of us commoners to get used to it so quickly, how ungrateful of us to sulk over slightly overcooked vegetables.This is a sad day indeed.
Okay, so the taj was informed earlier that there might be a possibility of an attack.So the securities were posted out front, and the crazy trigger hungry people broke into the kitchen and made their way inside the hotel. What was the security for? petty theft?If you call your right to live petty, then yes.
Okay so,the Maharashtra Govenrment were informed about the RDX smuggling.
People somehow wield their powers for all the wrong reasons. With the city being attacked so many times, how people can afford to be nonchalant is something to think about...
People seem to forget the difference between being literate and being educated, so the normal reaction when a techie is found to be involved we go "WHOA, but he is educated!" Time we realise not to fear bearded men yelling jihad but take that guy next door seriously who knows a bit too much about tommy guns,is extra paranoid about his religion.White collar terrorism is the name of the game.
How civilized of us to get a kick out of setting a bomb off under sombody's butt.How very common of us commoners to get used to it so quickly, how ungrateful of us to sulk over slightly overcooked vegetables.This is a sad day indeed.
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